Day 14 The Father’s Daughter Challenge

Day 14 You are not alone

 As women, one of our greatest desires is to get married (atleast a high percentage). I believe that this is The Fathers desire for His daughters that want to get married. I also know that for some they may not desire to get married.  Jesus also says in Matthew 19 : 11-12 …..marriage isn’t for everyone. Some, from birth seemingly, never give marriage a thought………..”


The Father’s daughter who desires to be married will often feel alone if she isn’t married even if she is surrounded by family, friends etc. The thing though is that she may feel lonely but she is not alone. This is the same way a married person may still feel lonely even in a marriage. There was a time when my husband and I were going through our marital challenges and I used to feel so lonely even though I was married.


The truth is the natural man is alone whether he/she is married or not. The natural man may be surrounded by so many people. He/she has  friends, family, colleagues etc but the truth is that the natural man is still alone. When we were born we came to this world alone. Even if you are twins, one comes out before the other. When we also die we die alone, even if there are many people that die on the same day and time or even in the same place, everyone dies alone. So the reality is that we are alone. When we take life changing decisions, we are alone. When we go to exams, we are alone. When we sleep, even if someone is sleeping on the same bed next to you, we are still alone in our sleep. This is the reality of the natural man.


Now with the spiritual man this is different. Jesus wasn’t married, so the natural man would say Jesus was alone but the truth is that He wasn’t alone on earth.  His Father was with Him. Jesus knew that our journey on this earth as the ‘natural man’ was a journey of being alone. But He knew that being alone is not good.


In Genesis 2:18-20 God said “It’s not good for the Man to be alone; I’ll make him a helper, a companion.’  However, even with this helper, based on the assumptions I highlighted above, the natural man is still alone.

Jesus knew that being alone (whether married or not) is not a good thing and so in John 14: 15-18, “Jesus said “If you love Me, keep My commandments. And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever—  the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.  I will not leave you orphans; I will come to you. (NKJV)


Jesus was with the disciples and he was about to leave and so He told them that He will send them another helper. After He died and was resurrected, on the day of Pentecost, while the disciples were in the upper room the helper came. In the book of Acts 2: 1-4 the Bible says  When the Day of Pentecost had fully come, they were all with one accord in one place. And suddenly there came a sound from heaven, as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled the whole house where they were sitting. Then there appeared to them divided tongues, as of fire, and one sat upon each of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.”


The disciples were no longer alone. They had the Holy Spirit, the helper Jesus referred to. The true companion. The Companion of companions.


We also have this same helper with us. Regardless of your marital status, whether you are married or not or whether you are happily married or not, you are not alone. We have the Holy Spirit with us.


The Message version in John 14 :15-17, refers to Him as friend. “If you love me, show it by doing what I’ve told you. I will talk to the Father, and he’ll provide you another Friend so that you will always have someone with you. This Friend is the Spirit of Truth. The godless world can’t take him in because it doesn’t have eyes to see him, doesn’t know what to look for. But you know him already because he has been staying with you, and will even be in you!”


He is our friend, He is our best friend.


I love the way the Passion Translation puts it in John 14:15-17  “Loving me empowers you to obey my commands. And I will ask the Father and he will give you another Savior, the Holy Spirit of Truth, who will be to you a friend just like me—and he will never leave you. The world won’t receive him because they can’t see him or know him. But you will know him intimately, because he will make his home in you and will live inside you.

I love the last verse which says “But you will know him intimately, because he will make his home in you and will live inside of you.”


Who is the Holy Spirit?  There are many analogies used to describe the Holy Spirit. Wind, water, fire, air, dove, peace etc have been used to describe the Holy Spirit. Simply put He is The Fathers spirit that dwells in us and with us. We have God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit, The Holy Trinity. The Father gave us His spirit to be with us while we are here on earth. To help us in our journey to becoming The Fathers Daughter.


We are not alone in this journey called life, we have The Father’s Spirit with us. He is our best friend. Our helper. He helps us. He teaches us all things. For instance, todays challenge is completely being led by the Holy Spirit. When the Lord told me the topic for today, I was abit nervous because I didn’t know what I’d write about The Holy Spirit.  Infact the entire Challenge, is being led by The Holy Spirit. I don’t know what we are talking about tomorrow, but He leads me and helps me each step of the way. If I had my way I would have had the 21 days all written down before we started the challenge but God wanted me to depend on Him along the way. I didn’t know what I was going to write today, but He has helped me and He has led me.

The Holy Spirit is here for you and for me, for us all. He is here to help us with the big decisions we have to make like who to marry, what school to send our kids to etc. He is also interested in the little things. The Holy Spirit has told me what to wear so many times. Anytime I ask the Holy Spirit what to wear and I obey, it is always a hit. I get a lot of compliments. The Holy Spirit chooses my outfits for my events such as my book tours or the do it afraid conferences etc.As much as possible I ask Him. I did this even more during my wilderness period, I asked the Holy Spirit a lot when I didn’t have options. I remember when I was going to Ghana for the book launch, The Holy Spirit asked me to wear white and I obeyed. When I got to Ghana I found out that Ghanaians wear white for special occasions. Sometimes my designer and I will think of the same outfit even before we speak to each other. Obedience is so key because I remember another time I had a speaking engagement. I felt the Holy Spirit said I should wear a sunflower kimono that I had been giving as a gift but because I had also received some other new clothes from another designer, I wasn’t obedient. It is funny how in my wilderness season I was obedient but now that I had surplus I didn’t listen. When I got to the event before I was to speak, the lady doing the introductions said she saw visions of sunflowers. I knew right then that there was a reason why the Holy Spirit asked me to wear the sunflower kimono. I felt so bad. Honestly the feeling of disobedience is not worth it. The Holy Spirit has also helped me decide what lipstick to wear. I remember during another wilderness period when I couldn’t afford to get my makeup done professionally for a friends wedding, I  asked the Holy Spirit to help me with my makeup and when it was time to wear my lipstick, I wanted to wear my usual lipstick colour but the Holy Spirit led me to wear another nude one that I wouldn’t have thought to wear and I obeyed. Gosh I got so many compliments, someone even asked specifically about my lipstick even asking me about my lipstick. If I remember, a friend who had her face done professionally even asked to use my lipstick.


I remember the early days when I was very nervous about radio interviews that had  to do with personal finance, since my back ground was in corporate finance and not personal finance. I’ll ask the Holy Spirit to help me, and I kid you not most of the time, what I researched on the internet was what the interviewers asked me. They probably had checked the same sites I checked. The Holy Spirit would even lead me to the  questions to prepare for.  Even in business meetings, when I want to show that I know my ‘onion’s’ by asking relevant questions. The Holy Spirit will prompt me and tell me what to ask. A few times I’ve been afraid to ask and then the next person will ask the same question I should have asked.


We are not alone, we have The Fathers spirit with us, The Holy Spirit our helper and friend.



  1. Do you know the Holy Spirit?
  2. Do you know Him intimately?
  3. Are you His home?
  4. Does He live inside you?
  5. Do you speak to Him and involve Him in everything you do?
  6. Do you make decisions without Him?



  • Spend 40 minutes with the Father today.
  • Ask The Father to give you eyes to see and ears to hear the Holy Spirit.
  • Tell the Holy Spirit you want to know Him intimately.
  • Ask Him to come and fill you and make you His home
  • Write a letter to Him in your journal. You can start with “Dear Daddy, Dear Father etc.


Bible Study:

  • Read John chapter 14
  • What is God saying to you? (write any thoughts that come to you in your journal)
  • What do you say to God? (write this in your journal)


The Father’s Daughter’s thoughts: There is information overload with the internet and social media. Media determines a lot of the decisions we make. What we eat, where we go, how we dance, how we do our makeup, what we wear, who we use for our wedding makeup, etc. The question I ask is who determines the decisions you make on a daily basis? Do you depend on social media, friends, family or the Holy Spirit? In John 14: 26 Jesus said  But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.”  If the Holy Spirit dwells in us, He should be the first person we should ask when we want to make a decision. After all Jesus said He will teach us all things.



  • Listen to “However you want” Jesus Culture feat Chris Quilala
  • Listen to “Holy Spirit” by Kim Walker Smith Jesus Culture
  • Listen to “Open Heaven (River Wild)” by Hillsong worship
  • Listen to “Here Now (Madness)” by Hillsong United
  • Worship God in your unique way. Feel free to dance, paint, write a poem, sing


Declaration: I am not alone. I know the Holy Spirit intimately. I am His home and He lives inside me.









4 thoughts on “Day 14 The Father’s Daughter Challenge

  1. Thank you Jesus!!! Hallelujah 😇.I know I the Holy Spirit is with me too because most times before I do anything I just speak to him unconsciously,I will say Holy Spirit take control of my day today “ You know you are my friend 🙂”and most mornings when I wake up ,I play Holy Spirit you are welcome here.My problem is atimes when He’s talking to me in my inner spirit ,I forget myself ,I pay little attention to the inner spirit ( so unfortunate) I remembered two days ago,I was in the Library,I wanted to go ease myself ,the Holy Spirit said to me pack ur thgs in your bag before going,little did I know,I told myself lemme just take my important documents because I was filling a job form on the table where I was,then I had some other books and a newspaper I was reading.Behold,when I came back somebody came to my table took the newspaper and left.I was shocked because I didn’t even see anybody and nobody told me any when I came back,the people around were just concentrating on their reading.I learned my lesson to pay more attention to the Holy Spirita d be mindful.Thanks once again for this platform,I totally agree with you and I can relate. All the qualities of the Holy Spirit as our helper…..,,remain blessed!


  2. I always felt lonely because I haven’t had a man in my life for as long as I can remember, not much friends, and have to keep ‘hustling’ to pay my bills. I know about the Holy Spirit being a companion but in recent times I haven’t lived that truth. Thank you for reminding me that he is with me in my deepest insecurities to guide me aright.


  3. God the HolySpirit is awesome… beyond explanations. He often make me see my unstableness trusting Him in totality in some issue of life, and at such times I feel so ashamed of myself.
    The thought of the killing by Fulani herdsmen crossed my mind as I was travelling on the highway today. That… what would I do if I were confronted right there. I responded in my thought that I will boldly use the opportunity to declare the Lordship of Jesus to them. Immediately I was cautioned by the Spirit that I would failed flat in such temptation, and He reminded me of a very little issue at the moment I’m jettery over, in which He expects me to trust and hold on Him.
    I need ur help and mercy every moment of my day Holy Spirit.


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